mark your calendars

maybe it's the friday the 13th thing or something but today i feel like i'm a hot piece of man-candy.

it all started when i was at lunch at chipotle (where all hip and/or attractive people hang for lunch, myself obviously falling in the former category rather than the latter) and i had a chance encounter with a woman that i used to work with at my after-school job in high school.

she was a year behind me in school and we both worked together at the local public library.

in 10 years she certainly had grown to become an attractive woman.

i on the other hand... well let's just say that i'm not the skinny teenager that i once was.

i noticed her immediately and got her attention.

she came over to the table and gave me a hug.

"wow!" she said, "i was standing in line and thinking, 'i know those eyes."

she then looked me up and down and said, "you look great!"

mind you, this doesn't happen to me often.

i reciprocated complement-wise and we chatted for a moment before parting ways.

i returned to work feeling pretty darned good about myself. who doesn't like a nice ego-boost like that?

the little scenario had made my afternoon and i decided to share the experience with my coworkers.

i related the story and explained how much i enjoyed it, considering my horrible self-image and low self-esteem.

then a female coworker replied, "are you serious? you shouldn't feel that way. (another coworker) and i were talking and she said she thinks you're the most handsome man in our group."

this immediately got the attention of the two other guys.

"what!?!" i asked in astonishment.

"you know..." she said, "we were comparing notes and we both agreed that you are the most attractive man on our team."

"wait a minute." i interjected. "were you guys playing 'who would you do in the office?'"

"no, we weren't!" she quickly responded, as her cheeks started to turn flushed. "it's just you know, we were comparing all of the men. and you know, for women, it's so much more than looks. we were considering things like intellect, personality and humor and you rank the highest in our group."

"you were playing 'who would you do'! you are dirty, dirty women!" i countered.

then leo, the russian animator, got into the conversation. "so tell us," he demanded in a stern, slavic tone "where do the rest of us fit in on this list?"

"well..." she replied, "let's just say you need to shape up because you came in pretty close to the bottom."

consolingly, i told him, "i'm sure that doesn't mean that they wouldn't like to have a little weekend fling with you. it's just that i'm the kind of guy they want to bring home."

leo was not amused.

then turning to my female co-worker i asked, "so tell me, did you guys rank us in the category of nicest butt? because i'm sure i've got that one locked down too."

then i proceeded to strut around our cubicles like a rooster singing a slightly modified, first-person version of queen's "we are the champions."

(i'm kidding on the last part. but this all actually happened today.)

the end.